Data Sickos Recap: The Masters
(Graphics, scorecards, and videos are best viewed on web)
Rory McIlory won the 2026 Masters to become only the fourth player to win back-to-back Green Jackets. As amazing as that was to watch, there won't be much discussion of Rory here in the Garbage Time recap today. For intelligent discussion about this year's Masters, look no further than Ryan Nanni's Bluesky account.
Amateur Fifa Laopakdee had the round with the least pars, making just four pars during his Thursday round. Nothing worse than a bogey though!
Aldrich Potgieter wins our Local Muni Golfer Award for the highest single round this year. That birdie on 13 will have him coming back...
Shane Lowry wins our Rollercoaster award for most extreme holes (eagles/doubles and worse). On Thursday, he eagled the 13th and doubled the 4th. He made three doubles on Sunday but the highlight of his tournament was on Saturday with a hole-in-one on number 6.
Shane Lowry aces the 6th
— CJ Fogler (@cjzero.bsky.social) April 11, 2026 at 3:43 PM
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I didn't look this up but I am anointing Shane as the all-time hole-in-one king. He's now made two holes-in-one at the Masters, one at the 17th at TPC Sawgrass, number 7 at Pebble Beach, and one a couple weeks ago at the Houston Open.
Shane is also the recipient of our Michael Scott Snip-Snap-Snip-Snap Reverse Vasectomy Award for the longest streak of holes alternating between over and under par.
Dustin Johnson led the field in pars this week, making 55 in 72 holes, including this ultra-clean -3 round on Sunday.
A disappointing tournament from a Clean Sheet perspective as we only reached 16 out of 18 pars with Matt McCarty's Thursday round. That birdie was for NOTHING. Gave it back immediately on the next hole. This is why you must intentionally miss any birdie putts if you've started with only pars. You have to maintain the Clean Sheet at all costs.
The Not Technically Dead Last But Also Kinda Dead Last award goes to Charl Schwartzel who did make the cut but finished in last place at +12. Cherry-picked notable players that finished below Kinda Dead Last:
- Bryson DeChambeau
- Min Woo Lee
[Insert old man rant about how these kids need to get off their damn phones and FOCUS on the game]
Naoyuki Kataoka had the highest nine-hole score of the week with a 46 on the back-nine on Thursday. He shot 39 on the back Friday...we love to see growth!
Brian Harman beat his own ass this week. He shot 79 on Thursday and his chances to make the cut got all the way down to 0.4% after playing the first four holes Friday at +3. He then went on a tear for the final 14 holes to make the cut on the number. he carried that momentum into Saturday by shooting 67, 12 shots better than his Thursday effort.
Bryson DeChambeau pulled a reverse Brian Harman by having a 97.1% chance to make the cut late Friday until he lost his marbles on the 18th. I would say "you hate to see it" but that would be a lie.
Chris Gotterup is our bounce-back king for the week. There were eight instances where he made a bogey and responded with a birdie. The next closest players were at five instances – Chris dominated the bounce-back category this week. On Friday, he had a 100% bounce back rate...four bogeys and bounced back with a birdie every time.
Maverick McNealy had the best back-nine charge on Friday to make the cut. He then had a really nice weekend, including a 67 on Sunday to finish at T18 and cash a check for $315,000. Not bad.
The Garbage Time MVP of The 2026 Masters is none other than Haotong Li. I didn't know much about him prior to this tournament and he is now firmly in my top-5 favorite players. Let's review his greatness.
He shot -3 on Friday after spending all night on the toilet. He wasn't sure if he would be able to play at all, then fires a 32 on the back 9.
He was a thrill to watch on Moving Day – shooting 31 on the front, including a near-albatross at the 8th that he knocked in for eagle. His odds for a Top 5 finish got all the way to 40.9%.
As he pulled up to the 15th hole, I was rooting for him harder than anyone else in the field. And then he hit a shot with a trajectory I am very familiar with, just not from the professionals.
The Shot Tracer of Haotong Li hitting a groundball into the water on 15 lol
— Scott Spratt (@scottspratt.bsky.social) April 11, 2026 at 5:31 PM
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After seeing that shot, my dreams of a Haotong Green Jacket were dead. But he wasn't done delivering magic. He shot even par on the front 9 Sunday. Boring, right? Wrong. he did it with just one par. Four bogeys, four birdies.
He makes a triple on #12 after hitting into the water twice... big deal, a bunch of guys have done that over the years.
And then...the 13th. My chief complaint with the Masters broadcast this year was that we didn't have a Haotong picture-in-picture at the bottom right showing everything he was doing. Describing the sequence won't do it justice...take two minutes out of your day and watch this, you won't regret it.
He had already won me over as a fan by this point but his reaction to making his putt for 10 sealed it forever for me. I love this guy.
Woman Walking in an Exotic Forest, by Henri Rousseau, 1905, via @garrett_TFE
— ArtButMakeItSports (@artbutmakeitsports.bsky.social) April 12, 2026 at 6:08 PM
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One final look at his Sunday card. A birdie after a 10...resilience.
Every week, I compare the pre-tournament odds for players with their final finishing position to see who defied expectations the most.
Overperformers:
Brian Campbell, T24 (+53 spots vs expectation)
Sam Stevens, T24 (+45 spots)
Matt McCarty, T24 (+41 spots)
Michael Brennan, T24 (+37 spots)
Haotong Li 🐐, T38 (+34 spots)
Underperformers:
Bryson DeChambeau, CUT (-52 spots vs expectation)
Robert MacIntyre, CUT (-40 spots)
Jon Rahm, T38 (-34 spots)
Akshay Bhatia, CUT (-30 spots)
Min Woo Lee, CUT (-28 spots)
80 Watch
Aldrich Potgieter, R1: 84
Naoyuki Kataoka, R1: 84
Davis Riley, R1: 82, R2: 80 (only two-timer)
Angel Cabrera, R2: 81
Mike Weir, R1: 81
Mateo Pulcini, R1: 81
Brandon Holtz, R1: 81
Shane Lowry, R4: 80
Haotong Li, R4: 80
Sami Valimaki, R1: 80
Fifa Laopakdee, R1: 80
Carlos Ortiz, R1: 80
Robert MacIntyre, R1: 80
Quad+ Watch
Haotong Li, Sunday, #13: 10 (+5)
Marco Penge, Sunday, #12: 7 (+4)
Danny Willett, Thursday, #15: 9 (+4)
Fred Couples, Thursday, #15: 9 (+4)
Robert MacIntyre, Thursday, #15: 9 (+4)
I'll leave you with my favorite images of the 2026 Masters.
Thanks for reading! As always, please share with anyone you think might be interested in this kind of nonsense!
-Mike
